I tried

I lost a part of me today, but now that it's gone, I realize how much pain carrying it around was actually causing me.  Now I need to adjust to this newfound freedom. 

I attempted to speak with someone that I hadn't spoken to in about 12 years.  144 months.  Yeah, a long time.  I had some questions regarding some things that happened a long time ago, that I was hopeful they would be able to answer or give me more information.  The conversation went something like this:

Hi, XY it's Cathy, is XX home?
Hiya Cathy! Let me get her for you.

Hello,
Hi, it's Cathy.
<silence> Cathy who?
Seriously, we are going to play that?  Look, I just called to ask about when I had poison ivy so bad.  You see, I'm losing my hearing.   Whatever you can tell me would be helpful, and I won't bother you ever again.

XX proceeded to tell me about the infection I had which is the information I was looking for.  I hung up the phone and tears started running down my cheeks.  You see, the last time I spoke to this person, I told them I was going to be a grandmother.  That did not go over well.  We hadn't spoken since.

At this point, all I can do is pray.  Pray that this person will come to know the saving grace of Jesus.  Pray that this person will realize just what they are missing out on, but most importantly for their soul. 

And as I write this, I feel relief.  Relief in knowing that at least I picked up the phone and tried to start a conversation.  Now I understand.  It's not me.  This time, it's not me.